Study: A child’s absences from school can challenge parenting
Increased school absenteeism has been a cause of growing concern in recent years. However, this phenomenon is not simply a matter of whether a child misses school. In many families, everyday life is also strained by difficulties in getting their child to leave for school, as well as uncertainty about how to support their child’s school day and attendance.
School refusal, that is, difficulties attending school caused by anxiety, can manifest itself not only as actual absences but also as difficulties leaving for school in the mornings, staying at school for the whole day, or participating in lessons in the classroom.
According to a study by the University of Jyväskylä, prolonged school refusal affects the lives of the whole family and often causes parents to question their own parenting skills. The situation gives rise to concern, uncertainty and feelings of inadequacy.
– In interviews, parents often said they had wondered whether they had done enough to help their child or whether they had handled the situation correctly. As the challenges dragged on, parents’ understanding of what good parenting means in such a situation changed, explains Doctoral Researcher Petra Vesuri from the University of Jyväskylä.
School absenteeism poses challenges for families and schools
When a child or young person in a family is struggling with school refusal, parents are forced to strike a balance between their child’s wellbeing and the expectations of others. Parents who took part in the study spoke of the negative feelings, such as guilt and shame, that their child’s school refusal aroused in them.
"Some parents focus above all on coping with their stressful daily lives, as they have not found a solution to the situation. Feelings of self-blame and inadequacy are common, although some parents did mention in the interviews that they had actively sought help and tried to resolve the situation by every means possible,” Vesuri explains.
"There are also parents who believe that schools and society bear a large share of the responsibility for the situation," says Vesuri.
As well as families, prolonged challenges with school absenteeism also pose a challenge to schools. Efforts are made to address school absenteeism at an early stage, but situations can be complex and protracted. In such cases, there may not necessarily be a single cause or solution.
"Teachers and other professionals often do their best to support pupils and families, but their options may be limited in situations where difficulties with school attendance are prolonged and there are many interlinked factors at play," Vesuri explains.
Indeed, the rise in school absenteeism has sparked debate in recent years about how to strengthen the wellbeing of children and young people, cooperation between home and school, and multi-professional support.
Parents also need support when their child is struggling to attend school
School absenteeism has often been examined primarily from the perspective of the school or the pupil. Based on the research, it is also important to take parents’ experiences into account, as prolonged challenges with school attendance affect the whole family.
"Based on our findings, understanding this phenomenon also requires taking parents’ experiences into account," Vesuri notes.
According to the study, the change in parenting was not a straightforward process. Parents described various ways of making sense of their experiences, as well as how their understanding of their child’s situation and their own actions varied and gradually deepened.
Many parents reported gradually moving away from self-blame towards a better understanding of their child’s situation. At the same time, some parents began to question the expectations of those around them and to defend their child’s needs more actively.
According to researchers, understanding parents’ experiences can help to develop the support offered to families, build parents’ confidence in their own actions, and strengthen cooperation between home and school. Supporting parents can be an important part of finding solutions in situations where a child’s regular school attendance is at risk, Vesuri notes.
Raising awareness is also important.
"All too often, parents think that only their family faces such challenges, and this sense of shame can prevent them from seeking help at an early stage. However, early support is key if going to school is a burden for a child. I wouldn’t want a single parent to be left to cope alone in such situations," Vesuri adds.
The study forms part of Vesuri’s doctoral research, which examines the challenges of school absenteeism from a parenting perspective.
Further information
Article
Vesuri, P., Vehkakoski, T., Rönkä, A., & Virtanen, T. (2026).Lapsen koulukieltäytyminen: Vanhempien kertomukset vanhemmuudestaan ja sen muuttumisesta. Kasvatus,57(4), 395–412.https://doi.org/10.33348/kvt.160737
Petra Vesuri
Doctoral Researcher, University of Jyväskylä
petra.j.vesuri@jyu.fi
